~finDinG U~

2008-04-23T20:24:00.000+08:00

eh..i shall change layout then update..haha..to be updated..LOL!

2008-02-27T20:33:00.002+08:00

okok i shall..update o.o
changed phone on saturday..i thought could retain my old number..but in e end..cannot T.T e person say starhub will retrieve back all the phone number which e lines are cancelled..sad sia..i cannot use back same number T.T in e end did some admin stuff and had my new phone..and a new number -.- having some fun w this nt-so-new cyber shot phone K810i..ok la..so far still trying to transfer from nokia to sony ericsson..everything opposite qi4 si3 wo3 le..-_-
dar say he wans to get darker..so take e chance tt this wk is my recess wk..we went to sentosa on tuesday..he sun-tan..i read my stuff..erm..quite a failure i thought..coz he didnt get any tanner frm wad i see today -.- think apply too much sunblock..my fault my fault >< or maybe e sun nt strong enough..coz monday night was raining..so funny..he wearing sun-tan attire..i wearing beach attire o.o e beach quite quiet la..wkday..for those who like quiet beaches..can go on wkdays ^^
all e CAs just over..stress sia >< like a lot of things v new and yet to catch up..5 papers for exam..out of which..none im v confident in =.= so stress..T.T
tourism project dueing on monday..as in our group MAKE IT due on monday..haha coz we presenting on monday..researched on all e food and stuff..find e pics find dao4 i wan to gobble up e computer -.-
kk tts all for updates..stay tune for more..i hope soon..zzz..^^

2007-12-11T15:50:00.000+08:00

ah so long nv blog le..should write sth..start to like FIR more and more..their songs are nice..and of coz os the other reason..hee..i shall nt state =P nice sia..>< especially this song i set as my blog de bg music..三个心愿..so kawaii~~below are the lyrics..started off by 阿沁wor~ <3

沁:我喜欢你的眼神温柔又危险
请不要戴上眼镜我会看不见
想要张开双手把你宝贝
想和你天天见面
想带你环游世界
飞:我喜欢你爱逞强苯苯的笑脸
在心中抬头挺胸坚定的信念
这个辽阔世界不够完美
但有了你在我身边什么都很ok
副歌(合唱):
第一个心愿为你把幸福堆积
天涯到海角头发到呼吸
第二个心愿给你最好的自己
再许个心愿我的爱把你占领
哦~~~
沁:为什么为了小事就要掉眼泪
好象有太多的事只能自己背
其实只要你说一句ok
现在就立刻马上变成你的superman
飞:这世上最重要的不止是誓言
只要你常常记得亲亲我的脸
我会永远记得这个今天
还有很久的那一天我也要有你陪
下一个心愿给你最好的自己

have been working for 2wks plus le..so fun back to work..though at the start was really memory testing..they all tell me the same concluding statements.."you still rmb hor??" -faint- wah..then e person i helping didnt come on tt day and im suppose to finish the small pile of job..disaster..took 30min to recover my memory on wad to do..LOL..yea..having fun working..though almost fell into a commission-based company..wad AssureBank~ zzz..aiya..they call then i tell them i wan withdraw..hehe..
christmas coming..so exciting..first time REALLY celebrating christmas..heee..happy happy..k la..stop crapping..get back to work..muahaha~ till then!
dardar jyjy!!︿︿

2007-11-19T15:01:00.000+08:00

today's computing exam only got one word to say: die
haix..lucky CA was quite ok..otherwise computing dunno how to pass..pray hard my CA can pull up my grade..ok..time for physics and chem..2 more papers to go..gambatte~~
dardar jyjy too ^^

2007-11-11T15:49:00.000+08:00

nv update..coz was busy mapling previously..now busy mugging..zzz..wad has my life become..diao..argh..but anyway..changed the bg song to 蒲公英的约定..the tune v nice i like it..hope u guys enjoy too..till after exam ba..then i'll be back blogging again..jyjy!!
dar dar (^^)

2007-10-22T12:45:00.000+08:00

ytd went out w dar's bunch of friends to celebrate a guy's birthday..first thing met at compass point..then one of them didnt know we gg down to town..so he wore basketball outfit..in e end ran home to change..zzz..went to walk walk in cp then took a bus to the birthday boy's home..quite a big hdb flat..then went in by the warmest welcome of his dad..then he say..see the guy's things can anyhow touch..if see money on table juz put inside out pocket..o.O his dad a bit..too open..then we on air con and watch tv inside his room to wait for him..waited for 45min i think..zzz..he came and we went down to orchard..ate at pasta cafe..thought it would be a very nice place but the food eventually was ok ok nia..not as godly as i think it would be..
oh ya! and before we ate..met this 3 people outside taka..they claim they are on a basic entrepreneurship course..so they have to sell a packet of tissue at $10..they see us as a bunch of 7 people..simple simple split $1 each then will buy from them..but the thing is..from the start they did not say how good their 'product' is and try to sell it to us..he juz say please help us..we need to reach target in order to graduate from the course..we all not convinced to use $10 juz for a packet of tissue lo..when we rebutted back think the guy realised he was in the wrong and try to argue back..then he cut price say $5..zz..if liddat can cut 50% price he already fail le..so eventually my dardar did a v cool action.."nvm forget it lets go..*walk off*" *CLAP CLAP CLAP* wah cool sia~~ the rest of us just followed him and walk away..wah tt guy the face was black de lor..muahahaha..who ask him wan argue back and he really didnt try his best to sell his pack of tissue paper ma..can cut price de somemore..yea we won the day~~muahaha~~
wanted to go find nice nice sandals..eventually cannot find le..newurbanmale no stock le..NO STOCK LE!! *bang head* can the new stock come in pls..no same design nvm..im desperate for a pair of sandals..=.=
ok end of blogging..gonna stop maple and concentrate on my studies..exam in less than a month's time..ok ppl lets chiong ah~~
..u too dar ^^..

2007-10-15T12:41:00.000+08:00

went to rebond hair ytd..hair so straight now o.O feel a bit wierd la..coz v light then weightless..like no hair liddat..felt quite happy to go do hair..so shut someone's mouth saying my hair cmi..(though i agree =.=) nt feeling well now..so cant blog much..miss my dar..T~T

2007-10-04T19:56:00.000+08:00

sunday was my sunday class's graduation..quite fun..seeing all the kids performing on 'stage' the hard work definitely paid off..though i still think (too) that they should not spend so much time on rehearsing an item for graduation day..coz..like no meaning eh..but have been doing it for the past 5 years so..*shrugs* some ppl was in charge of food this yr..and she claimed tt 2005 too little food..2006 too much food..so she insists tt 2007 will be juz nice..and the result? more than enough to feed 20 ppl de leftover was sent back down to the kitchen..wad else can she say now..=.= nt sure i will miss sunday class or nt..actually at the end of the day..when everyone left the place and say byebye to me..somehow i felt a bit sad coz dunno when i will see these ppl ever again..haix..
now coughing badly dunno why..today just had chemistry CA..tuesday was maths CA..nxt friday got computing CA..wah~~~ and my hw stacking up like siao..>< ok jyjy!
gg buy dar's new bag tml..so exciting..get a pink one for him..o.O muahaha~~ ^^

2007-09-30T16:51:00.000+08:00

okok i update i update..zzz..not free ma..aiyo~ o.O
had afternoon bbq last wednesday for some special occasion..a little out of expectation but still fun..though my attire was wrong..zzz..in e end i sunburn half of my back..it felt so hot that night can..then the next day it was pretty swollen T~T so pain..sobx..but afterall..had fun..and one sentence..thx dar ^^
one wk recess..it seemed like not a good break though becoz the workload is still there..still hafta do work and stuff..not a gd rest lor..zzz..i dun like the feeling that u go and play but go home and still have a lot of work to do..zzz..
many unexpected things had happened for the past two months of my life..thinking back..i think i am writing a script for a tv serial liao..nono..should be movie..not so draggy..movie nicer..o.O haha..can rate as the number shock of my life ya..bleah~
..as we discover and understand more..we love each other more..^^

2007-09-21T09:39:00.000+08:00

okok long time nv update i update update a bit eh..o.O
today last day of first part of sem1..gonna have a one wk break..all my stuff piling up..zzz..play too much alr..now hafta start packing the stack of papers left on my table..like newspaper liddat la..so high =.=
life has been great..sch is getting better with my bunch of friends..intending to go join the concert engineers..hiak hiak..back to PA!! wo0ho0!! i miss PA~~ T~T haiz..
went to queue for the ticket to ministerial forum on tuesday..cant believe i go and queue for 1h10min juz to listen to ah gong talk talk..LOL..didnt know so many ppl read my blog de till yp told me my class ppl is reading my blog..hey ppl~ thx for being concerned for me ya..^^
to my beloved 'hubby'..pls arrange a time for us to meet eh..1mth plus nv see u liao..since tt day we met for lunch and ur pop-up at the sch bus stop..haha..
and dar dun jealous ah..i meeting my 'hubby' wor..hehehehe..=P miss u~ T~T

2007-09-04T11:43:00.000+08:00

went to watch ratatouille ytd..such a cute movie..haha..the very typical pixar movie..where things happen pretty suddenly..laugh my head off..haha..
poor dar..haix..*shake shake* wake up wake up..can walk through this dark times ya..jiayou jiayou..tgt we walk past this hand in hand k..smile~ =) muackx..

2007-08-31T09:27:00.000+08:00

only got 3 words to say..
love you dar..T~T

2007-08-16T21:22:00.000+08:00

ytd celebrated our first month's anniversary in advance of saturday..lol..it WAS supposed to be a surprise..then..somehow it was ruined by my beloved dar due to his poor memory and lack of brains to really check properly where the place was..so..the first part was quite messed up..HOR DAR! zzz...when we finally settle down for lunch it was already 3pm..then got part 2 and part 3..in e end hafta forfeit part 3 oso coz running out of time..haix..so the planned surprise was left with only part 2..i was actually really touched la..juz nv say out only..so..i hope things will smoothen down a bit..not so tensed..haix..im tired already..but hafta hold on and strive hard..><
it will take a week b4 i can see u again ah..must jyjy ok..dun let me down hor..i pin a lot of hopes on u wor..^^
now school work..got one conclusion i have about econs..and that is..I HATE IT! zzz..how ah..i gonna die lo..the lecturer..got pronunciation problem..action become auction..then make me scratch my head so many times throughout the 2h..aiyo..die le la..then tutorial..my tutor is a post graduate studying principle of econs..and he's a PRC..not tt i looking down on them or wad..they really v smart..BUT guess wad..the way he speak is monotonous..=.= blah blah blah blah - - everything in one tone de eh! and moreover..he speak quite fast..goods become good-de..milk become milk-ke..argh~~ tt's why me and my classmate was like saying..econs hor..bao4 zhong4..starting to get use to uni life..really quite relax for a moment la..coz though like 6 modules..only 1 tutorial each week..so..it like all depends on that ONE tutorial..and the lectures..so really a lot of self-study to be done..must plan time properly..=)
ok! i gtg read my effective communication text liao..learn how to communicate EFFECTIVELY..zzz..till then~
dar dar *^^*

2007-08-14T19:42:00.000+08:00

finally today is the start of my tutorials..happy or sad huh..my class quite quiet..though it was suppose to be a noisy lesson (as mentioned by the lecturer)..that the best effective communication tutorial will be one that is very noisy..hmmm..we shall see as days pass..yup..found like 1 or 2 new friends to have lessons with..will start to know the rest slowly one by one then..
many things keep running around in my head..i know i have been hiding away from them..knowing the problems that will arise from them sooner or later..but i still chose to hide..starting to feel a little tired..but i really wonder..in e end..izzit worthwhile..many things are unforeseen..tt's wad im afraid of..now i start to understand why ppl commit suicide when they are over stressed..yes indeed problems should be able to be solved but..the pile is simply too high..and the pile fell on them..too heavy for them to pick the pile up again and so they chose death..i think i am piling my pile..hope it wont reach so high tt it collapses deadly on me..v cheeem hor..lol..zzz..
sometimes i juz feel like sitting by the shore..listen to the wind blowing on my face..looking at the sea and the sky..and throw everything behind my mind..but tt's fantasy..o.O only happen in my dreams..though it didnt while i slp..haix..why my life so sad..
work hard tgt k dar..i believe..we can do it tgt..=)

2007-08-09T12:55:00.000+08:00

so many ups and downs this wk..many downs and only 1 or 2 ups..zzz..things did not really get on well as i thought it should be..ok first thing..school started on monday..and i went to the lectures alone..zzz..so sad right..coz..I KNOW NOBODY!! diao..quite desperate to find someone i know actually..but..cant..i did see some familiar faces but..is those nv talk before one how to go and sit tgt leh..haix..i was lonely for 3 lectures on monday..tuesday..my light came..haha..i found hong hui min! last time rvco yangqin/ perc girl..so happy..we same school some more..haha..yup..secondly..some things cropped up at home..very depressed and discouraged by it..家丑不可外扬..shall not elaborate about it..but i would like to say..thanx dar..u gave me a lot of support..and i hope this dark period will be over soon..haix..lastly..i pray that in the near future..my life wont be this bumpy..im already bruised all over..bump some more i think either i break my limbs..or im gonna end my life..silly things..haha..that will happen when i gonna explode like a bomb..
im thinking of u every minute we are apart..miss u dar..T.T

2007-08-04T22:00:00.000+08:00

went to watch simpsons today..it was v funny and v stupid..laughed from the start till e end..those who haven watch pls..go watch it..its hilarious~~ spider pig~ spider pig..haha~~~ cant stop laughing..w all the stupid things homer did..
ytd was freshman welcome ceremony..it was supposed to be grand and memorable for freshies..but..it seemed kind of flopped in its purpose..lol..first thing was the wearing of academic robe..its to say the honour pledge..but..very wierd leh..why must waer that robe..but i think it would really look very nice from stage view..coz everyone wears the same thing..and saying the pledge..after that was the lights up ceremony..the emcee did rehearsed with us before..saying like first row light up then 3s after second row lights up and so on..producing a wave effect..BUT..when the ceremony came to that part..it was super flop..the emcee says "freshmen pls light up ur torch" then those ppl up at the circle seats juz lighted up tgt..so funny la..then become patches of light coming up..a diff effect from wanted though..really a nice scene..then got a windbreaker that is far too BIG size for me to wear..=.= wad a waste..bought some lec notes..haiz..everything gonna start again..a fresh start though..ok~ all charged up and ready to fly~ haha..will not forget wad dean of engineering asked us.."Class of 2011, Are You Ready To Fly?" inspiring really..haha..kk..tata~
miss u dar..

2007-08-03T19:58:00.000+08:00

izzit my problem or the world's problem..think is my problem..nothing goes right if i am the one doing it..dun talk abt academic work..anything in life..be it being a friend to others..or walking along the street as passer-by A..or even trying hard to be a gd daughter at home..i succeeded none..im nt good at negotiations nor quarrels..im nt gd at expressing myself..im a failure in speaking for myself..total failure..i cant see my future..i wanted to request for freedom..in a neutral and acceptable way..i wan to grow up..negotiations never ever worked out for me..its juz like a tug-of-war..i tried my best at the start..but within a few sentences..i will fall back..and within the next few lines..my chance of winning will be left to 10%..and finally..defeated totally..falling into the deep muddy pool and a big scar left in the heart..no idea izzit generation gap or is simply the difference in thinking..people do change as they grow..but..how come my change cant be seen..i really wonder..
now going uni..juz now president of NTU Mr Su was speaking..his speech was not boring..it was enlightening..awakening..and indeed i see a bright future..but when he reached the word "freedom"..suddenly the sky turned dark and heavy rain poured on me..freedom..muahahaa..freedom..a time to set me thinking..is there really such thing call freedom on this earth..juz like a wall surrounding me..at first i thought..the steps are there so long i be good..indeed it was there..slowly..i thought i reached the top and can climb over the wall..but a few layers juz emerged and im blocked again..and this continues..and continues and continues..sometimes worse..the steps i took broke and i fall..painful..but i still hafta climb..in order to get wad i desire..now..im just too tired..living on seems no meaning..i need a counsellor before i really do something stupid..
so my dear..if something really happens..dun say u wont forgive me..coz i dun wan another person to hate me..if it really happens..let me go..i will watch over u..and find a better one for u..things are unpredictable..dunno wad to say le..too demoralised to continue..

2007-07-30T22:12:00.000+08:00

3 days inches by..it inches..like snail..or i should say..even slower than snail..such a pain..there are many things that i do not know how to exactly put them in proper words..for the past 6 mths..i has increased my reliance on him..bit by bit..even i myself do not realise it..until a few weeks back..my thoughts were sorted out clear..but tt was before the meeting..i thought everything would be gone and be buried beneath the very bottom of my heart..i tried very hard to suppress all my feelings the day before the meeting..and treating it as if its my first and last meeting with him..with happy yet heavy thoughts swirling in my mind..i step on the journey..though it was a pretty long wait coz i too early..-.- things went on fine..we had fun..he was quiet though..but nv would i expect tt..we will get tgt..
everything was ok till i tried to convey the msg to the "authorities"..this is so head probing..i think if i had not tried to eat these few days..i would have lost a few kg..
so i decided..to work very hard to keep both sides going..to PLEASE my "authority" and to juggle my feelings and schwork tgt well..and i hope i dun collapse badly in the near future..
lastly..i would like to tell my beloved dar..we will strive hard tgt for the future..for our future..ya? miss u loads..

2007-07-27T14:18:00.000+08:00

so long nv blog le..a bit rusty o.O haha..have stopped working for 2 wks le..but quite a lot of things happened..and of coz..one BIG thing happened..^^
many things are really unpredicted..unforeseen..some comes very sudden while some slowly made their way to us..i have no idea how to really describe my feelings..but one word simply is..i am really happy..thank u very much for everything u did..certain things are nt meant to be said but i know you will understand..really happy now..^^

2007-07-11T08:49:00.000+08:00

sunday's monthly sunday class meeting was disaster..the longest and most powerful meeting i ever had..>< horrible u know..with 1 person shooting the ideas and comments of the others..wa..she everything got comments de..and say without thinking..she claimed that some teachers clinged on the primary 5 class for 2 years..she didnt realise tt she has been clinging on to p6 for 3-4 years =.=
her comments were so strong tt i really feel like standing up and give her a few tight slaps..it is obvious tt she is unhappy with the whole system tt has been build up and has many unhappy comments..true 1/2 comments from her i agree..but the rest are like..AH!! grrrrrrrrr..OK! end of sunday class meeting..=@
today is 3rd last day of my work..T.T so sad..gonna cry soon..i will miss everybody in office de..sobx..
dar..i will miss you de T~T

2007-07-03T16:31:00.000+08:00

wad a horrible yet wonderful wkend..zz..friday was the arrival of my new 32" HD ready TV..lol..quite nice to say la..samsung's design..quite a big hoo haa in my house as my mum gets overly excited about it...^o)
then on saturday was preparation day for my sunday class outing on 1st july...lol...spent like dunno how much time doing the label..testing out and stuff..juz me and bixia..haha..having fun for almost the whole day..
woke up at 5.45 on sunday so super early..-.-..bathed and rushed my breakfast..met up w yuhui and ran for our bus..and guess wad..her ezlink card expired..a long story la..but it goes something like..although the concession card is charged at adult price..but becoz we are not students le so tt card we actually cannot use..it was nice of the uncle to actually return the card to her otherwise it should be confiscated..zzz...rubbish..then we rush to SBYM juz to found we really late..thx to the auntie at the interchange..then after tt we made our way to Bukit Timah Nature Reserve..the journey was fun yet exhasuting la..the kids were complaining v far la..tired la..hungry la..haiz..ask them eat bread on the bus they dun wan eat -.- anw..when we reach the summit it was pretty early..then u know the clouds were like..slightly greyish..u wont know wads gonna happen..then one of the teachers INSISTED that we MUST!! make our way downhill..fine..-.- cannot discuss de wor..MUST..so as we trek down..the sun was so bright it hurts my head..then the bus couldnt arrive so we went to the quarry pond..very very nice..wanted to sit there and daze but cant ah..yup..then we went back shortly after tt..tt was sunday..deadbeat..
ytd i went for my medical checkup in NTU..wa disaster..messy..i am declared underweight..still -.- i thought i gained weight since start work wor..>< haiz..then the xray thingy..ok la..coz all girls inside..but still feel uncomfortable when u nv wear ur..u-know-wad..ya lo..
after much thoughts..i found tt time really healed my wounds..on the way to work on bus..heard li sheng jie's chi xin jue dui..ok la..it confirmed my thought of giving up..its a good choice..the only person left to be hurt is myself lo..he will nv know wad happened and wad i had been thinking and doing for him..and wish him and her happily tgt..to have enough courage for each other..=) feel relieved after sorting my thoughts out..^^ and i feel carefree once again~ ^^

2007-06-27T10:04:00.000+08:00

finally moved office on monday..tried my v best to settle down ytd..and finally got a little used to my new seat..aiyo..wad a ma fan thing to do..=S
the new seat here although a lot more spacious la..seems more comfortable..but..VERY COLD!! im freezing like hell..>< ask the person come and seal aircon also nv come..haiz..ending my work life for the time being soon...lol..i dunno is i no feelings or dunno how to feel..nt happy to stop work..and also nt nt happy to stop work..
finally found another file hosting website tt can host my music..zzz..so meanwhile enjoy the song from kangta: propose..^^ a nice song..

2007-06-20T09:55:00.000+08:00

moving office soon..and guess wad..i am crowned the label & packing manager! *faint* sounds so nice..manager..haha!! anw..hasnt been feeling high..so..nth happy to talk abt..received dar's bdae present on sat..love it loads~ >< thx dar..haha..though its pretty belated..zzz..HAHAHAHA..jk la..yup..angry w some ppl in e office who juz cant do things properly..n i dun like the touchy character -.- shoo shoo~~ dun touch me le..nt for u to touch..^^
yupyup..no idea wad im thinking now..messed up everything de feeling..haiz..wait till i sort out everything then i blog it out? or mayb i wont..haha..till then ba..><

2007-06-12T16:48:00.000+08:00

ytd was my bday..haha..happy birthday shanyin!!
my colleagues treated me to an italian lunch..i chose it..haha..wanted sushi tei but realised time too late..alr no seats le..so i chose italian..not bad la..aggrolio..izzit? the singapore's pasta..got chilli de..haha..not bad not bad..quite nice..yupyup..still mouth watering..haha..
3/4 of the day is spent in office..again..as per normal..then went home to maple..the moment i log in my 'meimei' was so excited and wants me to go cash shop see wad present i got..hee..dardar gave me a white tiger..kawaiiiiiii~~~so cute...i love it loads...it is to accompany in place of him when he's nt around..*^^* thx dar! muackx~ so happy...wanted to name it xiaobluko..but was rejected..=S had a wonderful day..not as boring as last year..coz i rmb i was mugging away..-.-
yup..my last birthday starting w one..19..T.T gg 20 le..ah~~ my youth!!! haha..kk till then..starting to crap liao..

2007-06-04T09:06:00.000+08:00

went to watch pirates 3 ytd..wo0ho0~ nice show..though i dunno why some says it is not nice..=S i shall nt be spoiler by saying the ending here..but i expected the ending to be like this la..yup..the new captain of flying dutchman i guessed correctly..=P a little sad like this though..anw..jack sparrow is as idiotic and funny as ever..*^^* my lover~~ oh man..haha..babossa was humourous this time too..and nt forgetting his clever monkey..zzz..
an overall very nice movie with the big whirlpool as the climax..nicely animated and all e fighting scenes..yeah!! pirates of the caribbean rox!!!
*pompom*
haha..ha..haiz..after all e happiness..hafta face back to my own feelings again..i doubt miracles will happen..from e way it seemed to be..i think its time to let go..recalling 2006..it was a fun, happy yet sad ending year..thinking that things will go right after As..but it turned out otherwise..looking fwd to miracles but it nv came..and i think nv will it appear..so i decided..to let it go..let it down the stream..and let it dispersed into the air..lastly i would like to say..take care my friend..=) friends 4 ever...

2007-06-01T09:34:00.000+08:00

a super busy vesak day is finally over..wah~had loads of fun at the 'carnival'..haha..we set up 2 stalls..one is game stall for the junior teachers while the other is our jumbo card sale!! the cards were from a bookstore tt closed down (-.-") anyway the profit was not bad eh..w the sales at 3 for $1..and some donations from the ppl who played the game at our game stall..the total profit amounts to $421.90..wo0ho0~ haha..thx all!!
reached SBYM at 8am..zzz so early..but alr bustling with the volunteers preparing for the day's event..some even camped overnight juz to make sure they can get early on time to prepare..=| then we started putting up the banner..i shld say me and yuhui juz started decorating a banner to put up..zzz..the first customer came even without us knowing..haha..she asked for the price..took her pick and paid..wow~ first customer of the day came even b4 we fin-ed setting up our stall..diu lian..but a good start! then the day started becoming hotter as it approaches noon..then at around 1pm..some grey clouds floated above..
then me and peng lao shi started playing..he say he sent email to tigong.com alr leh..why nv work..after tt i ask email correct not..got send to leigong@tigong.com?? haha! then he say muz cc to yupo@tigong.com also..and bcc to taiyanggongong@tigong.com..wahahaha~ peng..the tigong.com really worked u know..the clouds cleared a while after tt..and only to come back half an hour later..-.- then we rmb nv email to the wind ah ma..so quickly 'send' another one to fengpopo@tigong.com only to realise it's too late..zzz..then it poured..haha..so funny..ppl got stucked..so our game stall somehow become a little popular..when kids got trapped..haha..after tt 2 more hours..then started packing up..but after tt i went to help out office w some stuff..till ard 8 mummy then say go home..wa tired and sticky eh..then suddenly the topic she talking w a friend of hers become v exciting so decided to WALK HOME..*faint*
so decided to ask elton bring his authorisation down..to help him take his A-level cert..dun wan talk abt this man who went to NS la..haiz..dunno how much pain he suffer in NS..haiz..anyway..i thought could go home..then they continued to talk in the coffee shop..so i sat there for almost 2hrs doing nothing..and feeling sleepy bit by bit..step into house at 10.49pm..omg~~~after bathing 11.20..onto bed 11.30..wa tired sia..today dun feel like coming for work but loads to do..so..cant be helped..><
looking forward to sunday..go watch pirates..finally..haha..DEPP!! IM COMING!!
till then!

2007-05-25T10:55:00.000+08:00

pirates is finally here! wo0ho0~ but haven go watch la ah..no time..mama sick also..hafta take care of her ya..><
duNno wad to write eh..crap? but juz very excited about pirates 3..haha..weeeeeee~ k la..rubbish entry..zzz..

2007-05-17T10:50:00.000+08:00

pirates of the caribbean: at world's end
muahahahahahahahah~~
my beloved johnny depp is coming back on screen!! haha...yea! cannot control excitement..anyway..found tt my recent life has been surrounding maple story..and is really like a routine kind of surrounding..wake up > work > home > maple..die..nxt time sch starts how ah..>.<
miss my dardar..=X wkends then can see him..>< haha..muz be wondering when i got a dardar hor..my maple dardar~~ =P kawaii neh!
yup..and one of my colleagues left the company..so sad..haiz..everything gota restart again..^o)
this is a crap entry..or a crab entry? ah wadeva..sry to make ppl read nonsense..i assure nxt post will be better..hee..tatA~

2007-05-08T16:11:00.000+08:00

the long wait has finally ended...yup...
i received reply letter from NTU & NUS...
NTU - Environmental Engineering
NUS - Science
0.o
i accepted NTU's offer..hee..NTU~~ weeeeeeee..though i know lots of u ppl out there will be like.."why dun wan NUS! aiyo.."..haha..but i prefer NTU lo..=P
lo0king forward to the camps..where all the fun starts once again..of coz the horror of tests and exams will come bugging soon also..but..after working for this period of time..i prefer studying..working life is really..haha..u know wad i wan to say la ah..haiz..gonna miss my colleagues here after i leave..all my jiejies and gorgors..>.<
have been chiong-ing maple..to lvl 51 so i can go meet my dar T.T
i miss my dar..T.T
ya..no more things to say liao..zzzz..haha..taTa!!
enjoy the song..蔡旻佑：我可以..^^

2007-05-04T16:55:00.000+08:00

finally i renovated my blog into something super simple..gonna come out with a background...so pls be patient ya...haha..nothing much happening la..upcoming fun event will be vesak day ba..in the middle..maybe my company's family day...haha...till then...nothing to write la..haha..oh got got got..have been mapling..and the right hand corner is my little cleric in bathrobe and work gloves..i like her hair la...haha..and i found yp in maple also..so funny..yup..having fun..till then!

2007-04-09T12:27:00.000+08:00

wah...1.5wks past..let me first talk abt my edutrip..
first stop: Green Circle Eco-Farm. Wah~~ nature is nature lo...so many mosquito!! my goodness..haha..i donated blood to like 2 mosquitoes...=.= but pretty life experiencing la...seldom have time to walk on the veg farm in city area ya...pretty fun...
second stop: Hay Dairies Farm. Meh meh!!!!! ah!! so kawaII!!! haha...we saw the milking session and learnt some stuff about the milking stuff...the mother mehmeh can start mating when she is about 6-8mths...then pregnancy 5mth...give birth le...they can get milk from the mama mehmeh for 8mths...after tt the cycle repeats...oh dear~~ po0r mama mehmeh...haiz...then went feeding the mehs...saw the babies..more KAWAII!! ah~~ touched their head and they lick my hand~~ heeee..down the way saw the bigger ones...in their 'teens' and finally saw the adults...got one super big black one..i almost faint..so BIG tt the throat part there juz oscillate as it walks...haiz...but i wan to see them longer but we gtg...so moved on...
Last stop: hansmaan fishing farm. Saw a 1.5m big fish...which can grow up to 3m in open sea...*faint*...the way they eat is gulping lo...*faint*...damn big la...aiya...no picture to show...scary sia...saw other wierd fishes...and pig nose turtle...v cute...haha...then the kids went for longkang fishing...a bit lame though...the longkang area not v big...and u see a group like 30 kids trying to catch fish...some w skills..some juz anyhow scope still can get one full bucket...i pity the fish..running away for their life and hiding below pavements..but the person in charge took a broom and pushed the water...and there they are out...haiz...po0r fihsy...after eating lunch to0k a grp pic...then proceeded back to sbym...wah~~ tired man!
that was last sunday..juz now i juz went BBDC to take my basic theory test..wo0ho0!! pass!! first time jiu4 pass le...yeah~~ so happy...booking for advanced theory...in june...*faint*...haha...gambattE!! kk..work liao work liao...hehe...tata~~

2007-03-30T08:44:00.000+08:00

another 2 weeks rushed past...haha...have been happy enjoying life...so...nothing much to complain...but something to feel sad about...today is the last day of one of my colleague...she starting her school soon...so cant continue working...will miss the fun days with her yea? Hello angeline!! u reading this huh..=P will miss you orh!!
sunday gg to visit the mehmehs and the fishes and the veggies in Lim Chu Kang..wahaha..so excited man..think im still young at heart ah..excited over this kind of things =.=
oh ya!! i finaly got my cable modem!! wo0ho0!! though not on monthly plan yet but i can go online at broadband speed for free w Starhub FlexiSurf..yeah~~ haha..sounds like promoter sia..
kk..nothing much to blog about..maybe after sunday got more things to talk...tata~~

2007-03-15T08:40:00.000+08:00

its has been a hectic yet exciting and fun weekend...haha...till now then i talk about it...=P
first lets talk abt sat...woke up early to go haf Mac breakfast w jerlyn...the bagel...i shall not say it is not nice...and it is neither very nice...ok la...sth new...then we went to NTU open house...heard tt their commission for the day us $7/hr...woah...nt bad huh...went and take all the brochures and stuff..the talks ok la..nt tt bad..finally while i tried to explore the civil and environmental engineering building..we reached canteen A...saw a bit of other friends...and settled down for a pc or two prata..first time i see ppl chopping up the prata b4 serving..wierd..then i saw a familiar face..haha..shall nt elaborate more on tt face..can only say 有缘分在那边也能看到..

the next part of saturday..is the new year dinner at SBYM..muahahahaa..guess wad..im the host of the night..for english..coz my partner has been taking the chinese part for years..so she has been searching for partners to speak the english version..and off i go..standing up on stage..starting off welcoming our guest-of-honour Dr Wang Kai Yuen..it was scary at first..and i did tremble a bit..after a while..i rmb-ed my sunday class teachers telling me tt imagine the students as potatoes..so i look at Dr Wang and...haha...you know la...haha...pretty interesting imagination..the night ended off with a lucky draw of first prize, a washing machine; 2nd prize mini Hi-Fi and 3rd prize a DVD player! haha...a thrilling and fresh experience for me..to host such a big event..

guess wad i did on sunday..w sleeping late on saturday..i reached bukit batok at 8.15am to go climb bukit timah hill w my sunday class teachers..=.=||
didnt try climbing early in the morning before..so it was pretty exciting..as we walk towards the visitor centre..many 'visitors' walked to the carpark to 'visit' the cars parking there..THE MONKEYS!! didnt know tt weiwei was SO afraid of the monkeys tt she juz grabbed me suddenly..looking up and down..there's abt a total of 8-10..tt's pretty a lot at the bottom of the hill..hiak..started trekking upwards..the first part was really tiring coz it is real steep..to0k notes and thought of qns..finally we reached the summit..exhausted but happy..as we trek downwards through the summit path..we saw kids from another sunday class climbing upwards...they are only p1-p4...and they are doing fine..so we are pretty sure that our students can do it too..finally..before we reach visitor centre again..we saw a family of monkeys..and the baby monkey is sooooooooooooo cute~~~ so small tt as it tries to climb up a thin branch..the branch gave way and it fell to another branch..and it climbed again tgt w its siblings to another tree..so cute~~ and a few jumping across our heads..haha..and of coz again..w weiwei grabbing one of us...haha...and the funny thing is..she is wearing yellow top and beige bottoms..lets think..doesnt she lo0k like a big inverted banana...and we started thinking of monkeys having a radio station..broadcasting a news to all monkey population tt there's a rare scene in the forest..a big walking banana invading territory..and all to gather at bottom of forest to attack the banana...wahahaha...imaginations went wild again...hehehehee..after tt went haw par villa..there nothing much to say..so i shall stop here..

waH~~~ so long ah...tsk tsk tsk...nv blog so long before le...always short short de..hee..kk..got to work le...till then...tatA!!

缘分是否会再一次将我们拉进..

2007-03-02T21:15:00.000+08:00

Today is the day where the A lvl results are released…think cheng and mark lo must be very happy…our batch is the highest of ten yr avg…haha…50.4% w 3 A lvl distinctions and above…happy to see most of my classmates…though didn’t talk much…but apparently all are alright…
has been thinking wad’s gonna happen today…but…its over now…silently…without a word…on e journey home…juz felt very empty…the results were ok…I have no feelings when I received my results…nt happy nt sad…no feelings…looking at you…I know you did well…did not gather enough courage to walk over and say congrats…hope everything is going on fine…and all e best in your future…wonder when I will see you again…
all the best people!! Hope everyone can get the course you desire!! =)

2007-02-20T22:24:00.000+08:00

Happy oink oink year! CNY is now over…and back to work lo~
borrowed goong from my colleague’s friend and now watching it…haha…though haven finish watching but alr v touched by e girl…today’s episode…she said sth tt really touched my heart beneath…
单恋是很痛苦的，尤其这个人每天都在一起，会见面、聊天，那种感觉更是无法形容。朝夕的相处，让我更喜欢他
it really brings me back to May 2006…when I faced up with my feelings…and as time passes…e feeling grew stronger…and eventually…at the peak…it was broken by a strike...and e princess also said: 没有为什么喜欢信，就是自然而然地喜欢上了他。Sama sama la…no reasons…but I simply like him…
but as time passed…somehow we like lost contact w each other…
another scene show her hugging the prince’s teddy…those who watched the show will know tt e prince has a teddy tt he has been hugging since young…the prince went away to Thailand…and she was left alone in the palace…as she misses the prince…she took the teddy and made it a shirt…pretending tt it is him and started to play w it…acting scenes tt happened previously…how sweet…and I found my mirror…in e show…haiz…how come she reflected my thoughts and actions…90% alike…the difference is just tt they are married…
nv did I think that the past will flood my mind again now…coz have been happily working…thinking of jap and my driving lessons…for a moment…time twisted back to 2006…and memories flooded once again…moreover…my godaunt’s son just lost his love…seeing his face…I can feel the pain…though may nt be as strong as his…but at least I know how it feels like to lose one’s love…
maybe…you will never know how impt u were to me…

2007-01-29T12:05:00.000+08:00

wo0sh~ another week had past again..haiz..getting older and older..starting to think of other things rather than those before As..friends said i've changed..haha..for the better huh..yeah~~
have been working..happily la..juz completed a coolie task..where i have to pack up the old files in the work area and pack them into boxes to be sent to warehouse for keeping..haha..though almost all the 3-inch arch files are full (and heavy)..w all the dusts greeting me when i took the files down..i pretty enjoyed the process..though pretty lonely la..to do all these packing in the store myself..haha..
month starts and month ends..i see my colleagues going crazy..up to the peak..and back to normal..this routine repeats 12 times every year..haha..this is finance..nothing we can do about it..day in day out..wad we see is figures figures and figures..other than 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0..nothing else..wah ha~~
now closing mth again..starting to see everyone gg crazy..even I AM going crazy..so much things to rush..haiz..
my wishlists:
watch movies
bowling
kbox
shopping
argh~~ no time for all these..im piling up stuff for myself and now there is no time for all these..heeeeeng..=’(..tt’s how my maple doggie cries..heeeeng..haha..very into maple now..haha..so fun la to me..but maybe when I get sick of it I will find it childish..hiak..hey ppl! Please!! ASK ME OUT!! I’LL GO CRAZY IF LIFE CONTINUES LIKE THIS!!
results for As coming out soon..so scared..hope things go on find..looking forward to see you guys again! さよなら！
oh ya..and im self studying Japanese..hope to improve more eh~
わたしわシャンインです!
haha..

2007-01-06T22:53:00.000+08:00

Wah..my blog rusty le..haha..dun update really 发霉了..
3 weeks..quite a lot of things happen..and many things get settled down..life moved on..
firstly..im gonna learn jap by self-study..hope I can do it..without a teacher..hehe..secondly..gonna take up theory lessons for driving..wo0ho0~~thirdly..my Sunday class gonna reopen tml..another new year..another batch of students..another year of challenge..w new faces and new partners..fourthly (got such word??)..have been working for over one month..colleagues are all nice to me and I really had fun learning new things..though something went wrong w one recently..keep teasing his friend..coz my name ‘shan’ is the same as his friend’s ex..-.-|| childish…josh! Hear tt or not!! Haha…
2007 is a brand new year..on a new path..a new journey..without you..i wonder what’s gonna happen..and I wonder if miracles will happen..回想起来..一切的往事依然沥沥在目..世界会变..但回忆永远是不会变的..
new year new resolution..to rmb the past and create the new…=)
happy 2007 to all!!

2006-12-12T13:28:00.000+08:00

as time passes...many things are starting to settle...but no matter wad...certain reality cannot be changed...wad awaits...is only an unknown future...filled w mystery and unpredictables...
时间的冲淡...让我慢慢地淡忘了伤痛...不晓得你现在好吗...虽然不是太久没见面...但仿佛感觉上...却是很久很久...之前的挣扎...已经渐渐地沉淀...大家现在都很忙...但希望彼此还没忘记...之前的欢乐时光...和一切的点点滴滴...
嘴角勉强撑起了笑...也要让你看到最后一丝的骄傲...
我不是不知道...没有你的日子...会有多么煎熬...
...还是依然在梦里徘徊着...

2006-12-06T08:42:00.000+08:00

sunday night was a memorable night for each and every one of us...where it marks the end of our JC life...and all tt's left...are just memories and footprints of ours in one another's life...there are simply too much to say tt i dunno where to start...it seemed to be just ytd when i first stepped in NJ...and now...i graduated from there...though i wasnt in S06 during the first 3 mths...but i really enjoyed my JC life after tt...i miss S01...as equally bad as i will in future to S06...most of all...I'll miss NJPA...my small and cosy family...
off from those...grad nite was a successful one...though i felt like Cinderella...(hafta rush home...-.-") everyone looked so different...guys were handsome and girls were gorgeous...haha...it was wonderful...
though it is time we part...but down the road...i hope we will meet again...两条平行线也有交会的一天...希望那天不会太遥远...
不管将来的日子怎样...我永远都不会忘记我们曾有的快乐...所有一切的回忆...都永在脑海里...不会磨灭...
给予你最深刻的祝福..有缘就会在我们到过的地方遇见...
...离开你以后...并没有更自由...

2006-11-27T22:14:00.000+08:00

first day at work...my company is call Mercer HR Consulting Pte Ltd..haha...e ppl there v funny and cheerful...easy to get along too...when i got my first assignment...i see all the printed numbers almost fainted...regretted saying tt i love number...they love like ants la!! so small!! but...hafta cope la...signed a contract alr...yup...can do it shan!
it was so scary when i step into the office alone...the recept ask me to sit for a while before the person come to fetch me in...so i sat there like stupid..haha...then after tt she came...and she mumble tt the agent nv call her to inform her im going today...blah blah...haha...in the end they did nt set up a new password acct for me...so today was actually pretty eng2 la...met new colleages...crappy ones and ang mohs...a pure american...he speak i really dun understand man...so fast...haha...and we were talking a bout pronunciations where he make a fool of himself and we make fools of ourselves...so funny...looking forward to work tml...seemed so fun...maybe the stress part not there yet la...but the rules there pretty lax la...so nothing much to be worried about...
wad im worried...is you...whether u can get wad u want or not...haiz...nv a day do i take u off my mind...if u really know this...=')
希望...

2006-11-23T22:40:00.000+08:00

yea...got my first job...as a financial staff in some company...haha...maths will nv leave me man...haha...thx to my agent eh...she's a v nice girl/ lady...haha...yup...looking forward to monday...where i meet my company people and my boss of coz...wah~~ so exciting...haha...jump up from my chair when my agent called me tt the company hired me~haha...
days may not be as carefree anymore...hols gonna end like tt...haven watch happy feet...='(
anyway..looking forward to grad nite...wonder wad's gonna happen...hoping tt it would be a fun and memorable nite...for everyone...=)
praying hard for things to go smoothly on your side...

//finally..\\

2006-11-22T10:11:00.000+08:00

Yeah~~finally finished my As…after a long period of time…till now I still cannot believe that I have finished my As!! Wo0h0o~~ a time to relax…it was so horrible that thinking about it is…argh~~anyway…everything’s over and there are a long chain of stuff for me to do…=X

happen to fall sick over the weekend...wad the...a nice time to fall sick...=S

i hope after this everything will follow smoothly...afraid of bumps...haiz...

Wonder wad will happen in future…wadeva it is…I will never forget u…=’)

//怎么会开始对你有了感觉\\

2006-11-05T17:03:00.000+08:00

...feelx...

A levels has started…GP is over…up next is maths chem maths…haha…tue wed thurs…nt really scared for maths but a little for chem…and a lot for physics…a lot of concepts seem not right…really worried…
went IKEA to buy some furnitures..haha...a fun experience though...coz nv tried buying large items there before...so hafta go to the customer service officer to get things done...met this service officer who is so blur tt he has to print my invoice three times b4 he got it correct...oh my...after a long day...finally got things done and furnitures to be delivered this friday...looking forward to assembling them ourselves...the BIG family workout!!
happened to hear this song…quite new la actually…like it…and it depicts wad im feeling…does it? Haha…guang liang rox~ jiang mei qi nt bad too la…haha…
awaiting for 17 nov to arrive…e faithful day…tt quite a lot of ppl is looking forward to…where a new life starts…with a refreshed soul…haha…oh oh…looking too forward again…enjoy the song…

我曾深刻体会对爱感到胆怯
还好有懂我的你给我安慰

看你失落的脸又再为爱憔悴
我心痛的感觉竟如此的强烈

眼角的泪它给过谁
伤透了心也无所谓

我会愿意静静地
陪在你身边

如果说爱已不可为
那我宁愿藏心里面
其实我害怕会失去你的感觉

怎么会开始对你有了感觉
又深怕朋友默契转身不见
矛盾着犹豫不决
没准备跨越爱的界线

怎么会开始对你有了感觉
深陷朋友恋人之间的危险
进与退被爱包围
谁犯规都狼狈
谁能解围让一切完美

怎么会开始对你有了感觉
深陷朋友恋人之间的危险
你和我拥抱瞬间
不后悔这暧昧
星光唯美把爱放心里面

forward looking attitude…=) gaMbaTTE!!

2006-10-26T23:00:00.000+08:00

these few days have been thinking of wad ive seen..really wonder...haiz...
有时候许多事情身不由己...也不懂得怎么办..只能眼睁睁地..看着一切被毁...
想用一杯Latte' 把妳灌醉

好讓妳能多愛我一點

暗戀的滋味妳不懂這種感覺

早有人陪的妳永遠不會

看見妳和他在我面前

證明我的愛只是愚昧

妳不懂我的那些憔悴

是妳永遠不曾過的體會

為妳付出那種傷心妳永遠不了解

我又何苦勉強自己愛上妳的一切

妳又狠狠逼退我的防備

靜靜關上門來默數我的淚

明知道讓妳離開他的世界不可能會

我還傻傻等到奇蹟出現的那一天

直到哪一天妳會發現

真正愛妳的人獨自守著傷悲

曾經我以為我自己會後悔

不想愛的太多痴心絕對

為妳落第一滴淚

為妳作任何改變

也喚不回妳對我的堅決

只希望有一天...当你看到这个entry的时候...能了解...我在想什么...

默默地祝福你...找到心爱的她...

//mug mug mug\\

2006-10-26T14:38:00.000+08:00

have been mugging like hell nowadays...but learnt a lot of things everyday...looking forward to the end of As...wah~~ heaven then...haha...gambatte everyone!
hey...you...no news from you...wonder how you are...
hope you are doing fine...=)
all the best everyone!
shanyin!jia you!

//losing you//

2006-10-18T21:41:00.000+08:00

失去你…是我最害怕的事…但今天…我想…我真的失去你了…我们曾拥有的过去…快乐的回忆…一起经历过的一切的一切…最后我还是失去你…很多话我都不曾亲口说过…但在我心底深处…对你…我… …

人生…是一场戏…戏中的男女主角…我们好想选择…不过命运捉弄人…我心中的男主角…始终不知道我心里在想什么…或许因为太多的顾虑与害怕…导致我到最后还是没开口…只是默默地看着他…心里如今七上八下…挣扎不断…想给他倾诉的肩膀…却又不懂怎么告诉他…到最后…关心反而增加他的纳闷与不悦…好懊恼…要怎样才能让你明明白白地知道我到底在想什么…

现在也只能欣赏

唯一的合照一张

淡忘了的是那个街角

想念的是当时的微笑

生活中交错失望

越想念就越孤单

若再被寂寞迎头

赶上多感伤原来只是正常

你是不是也在品尝

一个人的咖啡和天光

是不是也忽然察觉到

多出时间看天色的变换

如果有一天我们再见面

时间会不会倒退一点

也许我们都忽略

互相伤害之外的感觉

如果哪一天我们都发现

好聚好散不过是种遮掩

如果我们没发现

就给彼此多一点时间

你给过的诺言…我依然记得…不晓得你是否已忘记…在未来的日子里…我也不懂是怎样的…眼看就要各走各的…心里怎样也开心不起来…考试渐渐避近…希望你能一切顺利…对你的关心…如果对你而言是唠叨…是烦事…在这里我向你说声对不起…一路以来…好怕你受到创伤…好怕你在哪个地方做事不顺利…好怕你太压力…好怕你…好怕…这一切我从来没对任何一个人提起过…只对床上不会说话的小动物说说…你从来都不懂…在大家面前…一切的坚强都是装出来的…是你让我领悟许多生活上所忽略的细节…
你笑容里的疲惫…我看得到…我知道…你做事的原因…别人不懂…我懂…只是不说出来…因为我认为没必要让他们知道…但每次我想问你时…似乎对你而言…我觉得好像很烦…你也不愿意多说…
当我需要你的时候…你却弃我而去…霎时间…我整个人都傻了…为什么你的举动会是如此…我实在不懂…那几个小时…我看着你…始终想不通…只能傻傻地往好的一方面想…如今…相信这一切…都快要画上休止符了…只能回忆过去的美好…除非…我所想的…一切都是倒反…除非你…

暧昧让人受尽委屈

找不到相爱的证据

何时该前进

何时该放弃

连拥抱都没有勇气

只能陪你到这里

毕竟有些事不可以

超过了友情还不到爱情

远方就要下雨的风景

到底该不该哭泣

想太多是我还是你

我很不服气也开始怀疑

眼前的人是不是同一个真实的你

暧昧让人受尽委屈

找不到相爱的证据

何时该前进

何时该放弃

连拥抱都没有勇气

暧昧让人变得贪心

直到等待失去意义

无奈我和你写不出结局

放遗憾的美丽停在这里

深深地希望…你能快乐…

//shan//
1820h

cruel world

2006-03-04T23:32:00.000+08:00

Why is the world so cruel�everything is like�I dunno how to phrase it�im starting to hate the world�

Went to the market w my mum this morning�I saw how the fishmonger kill the snakeheads�they were still lively and swimming around in the water a minute ago�in less than 10s�they lost their life after being hit quite a few times on the head by a big wooden rod�it�s so cruel�they die a terrible death�I almost vomited when I saw tt�how come we have to kill fishes this way�this voice down to one main qn: why demand for these fishes??

Some things are better not to be known�to know them will make u feel worse�make ur life sadder�and it just shatters all your dreams�all the beautiful images built up before in your mind�is this fate?? Or izzit destinated?? I wont want to surrender to fate�our life is created and pathed by our own decisions�though some are unchangeable�most can be controlled�there are ppl who succeeded in defeating fate�why cant I?? I�ll work hard�I can do it�I surely can�
=�) jia y0u shanyin!

fountain of things...

2006-02-12T00:04:00.000+08:00

so many things..flooding as if there's no end...i dunno wad to do...i dunno how to start..planning my timetable...listing out wad im supposed to do..it's all driving me crazy...though u dun feel like doing it...u still hafta do it...i really hate this yr..but...have to pull through...

piggy piggy...haha...u're so not cute...haiz...i know u wont read my blog one...haha~ so can scold u here...bleahX~~ slp so much..really becoming a pig le la..still nt scared..wan to get fatter..fatter liao later eat u up ah..haha..ee~ so bad...relax...i wont eat u de la...cant bear to do it...^.^*

friends...gd ones are really hard to find...now i understand why my gor gave a comment 2 yrs ago: "friends are hard to find nowadays...though i still have some.." tt applies totally to me now..haha..thx to those who have always been by my side whenever i feel down...u know urself la...dun need me to say right...later u become ego..=P
ya~~ hafta stay strong and pull through the year slowly...i can do it!!
=)
taTa~~

meh~
0025H

finally updated~!!

2006-01-28T22:07:00.000+08:00

wah~~~~~~~~~ my blog super duper rusty le..haha..here i am..updating it now!! =P
so far...sch started for one mth le..a lot of things happened...happy and unhappy things...discovered tt friendship is nt easy to maintain if both sides are unhappy w each other..and true friends are hard to find..i thx those who support me along during my down times..i urge someone to be more sensitive to others feelings and dun always look at things in ur own view..

anyway...v happy tt cny is here...finally can have some break...but to think of more work coming up next..really feel v tired..haix~ back to topic...
cny rehearsals were terrible and disastrous...but on actual day everything went fine...wheW~ after tt went for class lunch at J8 pastamania (again...)..ok la..nt tt bad..
k la~ gtg le..hope can write again soon..taTa~

i wonder if i like u...mixed feelings..happy CNY!

~* promos over le *~

2005-10-05T20:35:00.000+08:00

wo0 ho0~ cheeroX~
hahaha~ my long waited day finally came!! post promo!!! haahaha
cant control my excitement...
physics was a disaster...the air con was so cold at the back of the hall...everyone was freezing...even the guys were complaining...haha~so im nt abnormal..
it's killer la~ i dunno wad to say la...
fm...i thought it was ok...ya~ haha...but results always come out opposite one...=S
very happy very happy very happy!!
haha~
kk..going off to play le...write nxt time!!

~* promos comin *~

2005-09-02T22:17:00.000+08:00

damn stress la~ promos comin...though everyone look slack...but i know..they are mugging...
but i am seriously nt on the track...haiz...dunno la...
got a lot to catch up for physics and chem...yupz...esp chem...coz first 3 mths didnt take...so now still a bit of a struggle....
today is passion pursuit day..rather interesting cum boring...haha...o0ps~
then we were supposed to have GP compo after tt...but like almost everyone nt in mood to go la~ so...we decided to mass pon...!! wo0ho0~
she got 4 classes...2 classes all pon...one half pon...left our class still deciding...in the end we sat down in the canteen and started to think...shld we pon or not?? haha~ in the end...after half an hour...yup...we shld all pon...haha~
so guo ying...
went west mall with shiyun and sia see...ate kfc for 1 hour...me and shiyun can really compete with each other for eating the slowest~ hahaha!!! achievement eh! got someone slower than me!! yeah!! *crows flying pass...aH~ aH~ aH~*
crapping a lot....haha...juz finished editing my EoM...hope no more errors le...
i really hate PW...it's a waste of time..effort and energy...
promos....i hope it can come...i hope it wld be over soon...so tt open day will follow up...busy yet fun day~ wo0ho0~!
kK..gtg...damn tired..hafta rest..juz recover from 4 day flu....wo0o0o0o0o0o0o0~ haha~ cya
;p

~bu shuang~

2005-08-18T20:22:00.000+08:00

Sianz�life is so hectic�though only got one CCA�but it is the school work tt is hectic and not the CCA�things are piling up�and mr neo say tutorials will only be completed by Dec 2005 becoz there are simply too much work�-.- duh right�go through lectures so fast and make the tutorials drag�=S
Class is still ok�but some pple I juz cant stand them anymore�
�think they�re really tt great izzit�so wad if my sch�s English is really tt bad�ur Chinese very gd meh? Oso poor in one of the lang wad�worse thing is ur mother tongue oso nt gd�still consider urself as a Chinese??! Think thrice b4 suan-ing ppl la�!@#$%^&*�haha~ o0ps! Didn�t mean tt but juz typing for fun�coz one line across the keyboard�bleah~ =P
And oso�can u stop ur stupid attitude??! Dun u know this kind of attitude is wrong in both sch work and responsibilities tt u have?? Do u know tt affects others oso u know? U think u can get away by juz slacking away and acting blur?? I cant say tt ur work are really nt up to standard coz I know mine juz crossed the borderline�and�stop thinking tt others are supposed to supply u with food ok�u need to save money then means u can let others spend money and let u eat meh�I dun care if u see this entry�if u dun like me�juz be it�
Ok�finish complaining�haha~ feel much better after blabbering so much�haha~ kk�gtg do GP le�=X aRGH! I HATE GP! CyA then!
-*learn to be strong*-

~PW / ComServeDay~

2005-08-10T21:06:00.000+08:00

ah!! i really really hate PW!! got so much stuff to evaluate and analyse...=x the cover of the bk was a muscle man..then i went to the photocopying shop to ask auntie help me photocopy right...then sh cldnt find the bk at first coz quite a lot at her shop...then i say got a muscle man one...she found the bk and ask me: "hah! u wanna practice to get muscles ah!! u sure or nt..u so thin.." hahaha~ -.- some sense of humour huh...bleahX~ monday was community service day for NJCians...so...we took care of some kids...haha~ so fun..there are from salvation army Bukit Batok...haha~ got some of the kids very naughty and one very outstanding naughty one...call Jerome...haha~ damn hyper lor him...=p some pics to see below...;P

~satisfaction~

2005-08-07T21:02:00.000+08:00

whenever i finish wad im suppose to do...got a mo4 ming2 de satisfaction...haha~ dun u =P
as time passes...we get older...more and more things to handle and think of...decisions to be made...it is not only studies...but occupation and the path u wanna go in the future...and of coz...ur future partner...=)
tt one cant be forced la...when the moment comes...u will have it...if nt...u wont have it...(duh)
so sian...facing the hw i hafta do everyday...but i have the motivation to do it..dunno where it came from...from my will ba...haha...interesting...hmxXx...
ever thought tt if i nv come to NJ..i wld be in poly doing my diploma...and get out to work in like 2 -4 years time...but now in JC...a better path to U la...so hafta pia...
so...work on ppl!! tml hafta reach sch ay 630...=X for PA...ah! haha...but i love it...yeAH!
PA r0x on~ ;P
=the 20 man team=

-*finish ur work today and dun wait till tml*-

~clearing my pile of work~

2005-08-05T22:42:00.000+08:00

wa~! so much work to do!
tuturials...yes...tutUrials...haha...one error made by one of our beLoveD fm teacher...=P
yupx..tutorials...assignments...haix...hafta plan time properly this long weekend plus sch hols...use time wisely....to complete my pw and stuff....haix...

as ppl around are changing...im changing at the same time too...the world is everchanging...nobody is gonna stop and wait for us to catch up...we hafta work hard...to get wad u want...and achieve ur targets...im trying my very best...to do wad i can...i wanna take s paper to get my scholarships...but...my results are nt tt gd...anyway~ i wld give it a shot...since it's time to study...why nt study and enjoy nxt time right...hmxXx...correct mindset...so the next step is to do something!! haha~

-*use ur time wisely*-

~crazy~

2005-07-29T16:12:00.000+08:00

going crazy again...haha...actually i dunno wad to write la...
on wed..the heads in sch went through our common test results...on the average was go0d...
but i know i didnt do well...haha...19 ppl failed 2 or more sciences...haiz...
first time being the minorities...didnt felt good...it's really time to go for my promos...
if nt i'll really die badly...haiz...
juggling between friends and sch work...real hard...sarcrifices hafta be made la..but im nt gonna sarcrifice my time for going out to play with friends or wad...nt tt im being selfish or wad...but studies always comes first right...
shall end off here and say no more...haha~

-*treasure your time of studying..do not regret nt studying hard enough in the future*-

~project work~

2005-07-21T21:24:00.000+08:00

this is the third time im typing this coz the browser is nt working tt well....=S projeect work...the thing tt is fan-ing all of us...im irritated by it...and i hate it...all the surveys...interviews...data collection...designing of programme...argh~intolerable...i can tell everyone is stressed up...esp my grp leader...po0r girl...i felt guilty when the survey form wasnt sent to her mailbox...i wanted to retype but everyone agreed tt it's a waste of time..so..ya...=(but i really dun like some ppl...who want to get things done quickly but dun wanna put in enough effort in it...ya...i hope im nt liddat..i dun wish to be liddat though..im really pissed off with tt pers0n... jc life is really tiring...haix...h0pe i can pull through...='(

-*pull through the bitterness and u'll taste the sweetness of the hard-borne fruit*-

~always look on the bright side of life~

2005-07-19T22:33:00.000+08:00

hmxx..looking at all the things around me..actually im quite satisfied with wad i have...sometimes shldnt grumble tt much abt life..like it being good or not...coz it's juz life...u cant possibly live in a world on your own..how are u gonna survive?!! no food no electricity no water nothing but air..haha...the air molecules will be your friends then...**freeze**
haiX~ i really miss RV days...it was so much relaxing then now...though sometimes i do have difficulties juggling between CO and sch work...but i still managed to survive...now in NJ...life is really more fast paced...looking at all those experts in other classes...competitions are tough...to get a scolarship...u need 4A-level and 2S papers...u see! so tough..hafta work hard le...ok~ end off le...hafta slp...sleepy eyes liao...becoming panda...again...=S

-*look on the bright side of life...it will make you feel happier*-

~...bo0!...haha...~

2005-07-14T21:07:00.000+08:00

yeah~ recover from mood swing le...-_-...tt's gd right?? haha...sorry to have make u guyx worry abt me..bleahX~ me so bad eh...bad girl! haha~
tml gonna be physics SPA...skill B...scary...dunno if will get prepared or nt...haix...ok la~ dun worry so much...
everything was quite fine...so nothing to comment about...haha~
all the best for my physics SPA...jia y0u!

>>such a boring entry...-.-<<

msG: hey ppl! if g0t any blog skins or wad...tell me ok! leave a msg in the tagboard...thx l0aD!

-*live your life to the fullest-*

~dead~

2005-07-13T21:33:00.000+08:00

think im quite dead nowadays...nt tt lively...haha~ or i shld say like a walking corpse...
today oso liddat...dunno...maybe is my character problem...dun like this world...then i'll recall wad my mum told me..."if u dun like this world..find one tt only U lives in"...ya...there'll be one thing i hafta work on...coord geom is making me crazy..translate...reflect...replace x by x-a...blah blah blah~
feel like exploding le la...feeling so bad this wk down...i can sense the change in myself...i juz wanna recover frm tt...i h0pe everyone can give me a chance...=')

-*pain requires time to recover*-

~...mo0d swing...~

2005-07-12T21:24:00.000+08:00

today got quite a bad mood swing...again...
i know ppl around me are getting tired of me...i know...i can feel it...
sry ppl...i can be intolerable at times...but i ensure this is temp...currently im really feeling bad...so...if i got de2 zui4 u guys in any ways...im really sry...

haiz~ life's bad...i dunno wad to write...

today went for the oral presentation workshop..haha~ it was real fun...everyone were to give a one and a half minute speech in front of the class..it was videotaped...then after tt others gave comments and towards the end..we watch the video of ourselves...it's so damn funny...haha....learnt a lot...gestures...postures...how to project voice...yupX...

-*to love is to care*-

~..sad..confused..~

2005-07-11T20:51:00.000+08:00

maybe it's my ming4 ba...i dunno...everything doesnt seems to be smooth...
my wishes dont seem to be able to come true...
i dunno...it's like...i dunno how to say...and i oso dun feel like saying...
getting moody easily nowadays...say things...maybe is becoz too soft...no one seems to hear me...
i feel lost...al0ne...everyone's busy with their own things...ya~ tt's understandable...
im trying hard to catch up with my work...so sad...maybe im too sensitive...feel like no one cares abt me...ya~ nvm...life still goes on...at most i'll juz survive on my own in this world...=(

~entry two~

2005-07-10T22:19:00.000+08:00

haiz...so sianz...gonna start a new day tml...yeah!! tml pe play bball..haha...so excited...long time nv touch bball le...ever since PA camp played captain's ball...so hiong la tt time..
miss someone...hmxXx~shld it be phrased tt way?! maybe...maybe nt...or juz my purely imaginations..
sometimes will hafta learn new things..accept new scenarios..and adapt..like now..im trying hard to change my attitude..and my usual style of tokin..i know it can be irritating at times..coz my brain cant really think tt fast..so when i speak..it may be too straight sometimes for others to accept..thus..need to change..
bought a new diary book..can start my new writings again~ haha..so excited abt a new diary..bleaHx...so childish..maybe can write all my thoughts and feelings down again ba..i love tt..it feels like im talking to a friend tt i trust a lot..haha..coz this 'friend' will nt tell the secret to others..o0ps~
anyway..gtg slp.. v.tired le..=P

-*it's stupid to hate someone..love everyone tt leaves a small footprint in your life ;P*-

~first entry~

2005-07-10T13:04:00.000+08:00

y0x peeps..haha..this is my first entry man...cant believe tt i started a blog..haha..
anyway..CT's over la..receive back all my papers le..except for GP la..bad grades..nv had a E b4 in my Maths..haix..so demoralised..thought could get at least a D or something..but..ya..hafta face it lor..who ask me brain so stupid..cant think of the solution on the spot..see la~ now cry oso no use le..hafta lo0k up and walk ahead..3 mths to promos..scary huh..=X
currently left PA as my only CCA..a bit slack la..though quite sad tt nv got in exco..but my passion is still there..haha..to provide service for others..and tackle with the equipments..=P
feeling l0w now..bored and tired..yupx..thinking of someone..hmxXx..haha..crazy me..
shouldnt be so crazy..got to concentrate on work now..cyA ;P

-*everyday is a new start...start afresh!*-

~*finDinG U*~

//finally..\\

//怎么会开始对你有了感觉\\

//mug mug mug\\

//losing you//

cruel world

fountain of things...

finally updated~!!

~* promos over le *~

~* promos comin *~

~*bu shuang*~

~*PW / ComServeDay*~

~*satisfaction*~

~*clearing my pile of work*~

~*crazy*~

~*project work*~

~*always look on the bright side of life*~

~*...bo0!...haha...*~

~*dead*~

~*...mo0d swing...*~

~*..sad..confused..*~

~*entry two*~

~*first entry*~